Laowai

Pleas join me in remembering the great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes to the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The grave site was piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at time he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for 20 minutes.

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Grandma Dice passed this on to me earlier this week. It seems just up Grandma and Grandpa’s comedy alley. It reminds me of the time Grandma had a good giggle when we told her that Brian’s new nickname was Pecorino (after visiting the Pecorino cheese making region of Italy).

Thanks Grandma.